


Goodbye, My baby...

by hybridempress



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Angst, F/M, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-19
Updated: 2015-05-19
Packaged: 2018-03-31 08:20:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3970738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hybridempress/pseuds/hybridempress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Belphegor has been in love with Mammon for longer than he cares to remember, but his heart is torn in two when Mammon realizes she has feelings for Squalo.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye, My baby...

 "Have you ever been in love with someone, Mammon?"   
  
    The purple-haired girl turned her attention away from the beetle she had been so absent-mindedly watching as it crawled in front of her feet, and instead looked at the blond-haired prince who had asked her the question. She stared blankly at him for a moment, trying to process the words he had just said to her. No one had ever asked her a question like that before. Why was he asking her now? She knew the answer right away, but the question caught her off guard just the same.  
  
    "What do you mean?" she asked finally, her voice emotionless and her face expressionless. Of course, she knew exactly what he had meant, but she was trying to buy herself a little time to get over the shock of the question.  
  
    He sighed, seemingly sounding frustrated, but he composed himself quite quickly and began to give her the most poetic answer he could think of to the point where it would almost make her sick. But it wasn't just to annoy her or get back at her for asking him such a stupid question in response to his own highly reasonable question, but it was because this was the first time he'd ever be able to tell someone how he was feeling right now, and how he had been feeling for the last several months.   
  
    "You know... Have you ever known someone who makes your heart pound at the mere mention of their name? Someone who makes the heat rise to your face whenever they show interest in you? Someone that you can't stop thinking about, not even when you sleep? Someone that you would give  _anything_  for?" he asked, his usual sing-song voice sounding even more wistful and far off than usual. The smile on his face was wider than usual. It looked more genuine.   
  
    By now, Mammon was over the initial shock of the question, but she still stared at her companion with a mixture of confusion and disgust. "What the hell's gotten into you, Bel? Why're you so interest in love all of a sudden?"   
  
    "What do you mean all of a sudden? I've always been in love with the concept of love..." Belphegor purred softly.  
  
    Mammon rolled her eyes. "Look, you're acting weird, Bel. Even for you. Now why don't you just hurry up and tell me what this is all about?" she asked him.  
  
    "I really just want to know if you've ever been in love," Belphegor answered. "You're being shifty about it and avoiding the question. That means there must be someone!"  
  
    "Yeah, and his name is Money," Mammon said sarcastically.   
  
    Belphegor frowned. "Come on, Mam, I'm being serious..." he muttered.   
  
    "So am I," Mammon said. "I mean c'mon, Bel, no one  _actually_  feels like that when they're in love, do they? That's only in fairy tales. Real life romance isn't that... Romantic. Right?"   
  
    Belphegor's frown seemed to deepen. It actually made Mammon worry for a moment. She had seldom seen Belphegor frown. Even when he was unhappy, he almost always smiled. If he was letting his guard down like this, there must be something very wrong.   
  
    "Hey, are you okay...?" she asked softly, trying not to let the worry she was feeling in her heart show in her voice.  
  
    Belphegor waved his hand dismissively and the frown disappeared from his face, though it was replaced with an expression of neutrality rather than his usual euphoric grin. He seemed so... Disheartened, somehow. It was almost depressing.   
  
    "I'm fine, Mam," he said quietly. "You're right. Romance like that doesn't exist in the real world."   
  
    The tone of Belphegor's voice made it sound like his lifelong dream had just been smashed into pieces. It almost made Mammon feel guilty. She had never thought that something she said would so easily dishearten Belphegor, of all people. In fact, she didn't think anything was capable of wiping the prideful grin off of the prince's face. Something was definitely wrong, but Mammon wasn't quite sure how to go about finding out what it was.   
  
    "Bel, I-"   
  
    Belphegor stood up from the wooden bench that the two had been sitting on together. "It's getting late. The sun will probably set soon. Boss'll be mad if we're not back soon," he said.   
  
    "Belphegor-"   
  
    The sadistic prince was already walking away. Mammon knew that it would be useless to try to ask him what was going on. If he wanted her to know, he would have told her. There was nothing to be done now but follow him home in silence.   
  
\---  
  
     _Thunk!_  
  
    Another knife impaled itself into the ceiling above Belphegor's bed. There were thirteen knives impaled in the ceiling know, and impaled in such a pattern that they were slowly forming the shape of a heart above Belphegor's head. It wasn't very entertaining, seeing as how he was able to hit his mark every single time with no effort at all. At least it gave him time to think.  
  
    The others had definitely noticed that something was up with him. He'd tried to hide it, of course, but it was no secret that Mammon's response to his question earlier that day had thrown him off guard. He felt stupid. He should have been expecting it. After all, he'd known Mammon for long enough to realize that the only thing she showed affection for was money. Sure, she cared about her friends, the rest of the Varia squad, but there was no way she'd ever fall in love...  
  
    It was a tragedy, really. A lonely prince had fallen in love with a spoiled princess and she would never give him a second glance. He wasn't really sure how it had happened. He'd known her for years; ever since he was a child. He'd never seen her as anything but a companion. A teammate and a friend. Someone he'd trust his life with, but never his heart. But things were different now.   
  
    All of a sudden, she was all he could ever think about. He wanted to impress her; get her to notice him somehow. He wanted to spoil her and make her feel like the princess he saw her as. She was the most beautiful thing in the world to him. What he wanted, more than anything else in the world, was to be able to hold her tight and kiss her hair and call her  _his._  But it was a fantasy and nothing more. He knew that now.   
  
    He wasn't sure just when he had fallen in love with her. All he knew was that his feelings for her had begun to consume him not long ago and there was no sign of that stopping anytime soon. He wondered how long it would take for the heartache to go away; for right now he wanted nothing more than to forget that he had ever loved her in the first place. If she didn't feel the same way then what was the point? It would only hurt him to be around her. But maybe... Maybe there was still hope.   
  
    Maybe she wasn't in love with him just yet, but maybe she would be, someday. After all, it happened so suddenly to Belphegor after so many years. Maybe it would happen to Mammon, too. Maybe it was just taking a little longer. And maybe Belphegor could help it along. Maybe if he was more affectionate towards her, and spoiled her more, maybe she'd realize she felt the same way.   
  
    It was a long shot, but what else could he do? Give in to the heartache? No, that wasn't an option. He was a prince. He always got what he wanted, and he wanted Mammon. He'd try his best to win her over, no matter what it took. He was willing to do anything for her. After all, that's what love meant, right?   
  
    He didn't want to think about it anymore right now. He was tired. A quick glance at the clock that was ticking on his wall told him that it was almost one o'clock in the morning. Everyone else would surely be asleep by now. He was bored and his head hurt and his heart ached. When laughter wasn't present, sleep was the best medicine, right? So sleep was what he was going to have.  
  
    He didn't bother to finish the heart he had been trying to create with his knives, nor did he remove them from the ceiling. He wasn't worried about them falling. They were stuck deep enough into the wall that they wouldn't budge unless he yanked them out. Besides, he'd survived through worse than knife cuts before, and he was too tired to do anything about them, anyways. He shuffled under his blankets and pulled them up over his head. Almost instantly, he fell asleep.  
  
\---  
  
    Belphegor was in a considerably better mood the next morning. In fact he seemed to be almost back to his usual self. Everyone picked up on it. Mammon was the first to notice. Though she didn't say anything out loud, inwardly she was relieved. She really had been worried about him yesterday, but felt she didn't have to anymore, since the smile had returned to his face this morning.   
  
    "Glad to see you're feeling better, Bel! Oh, you know how much I love your smile!" Lussuria said as he watched Belphegor walk towards the rather large dining table where the Varia usually ate together.   
  
    In return, Belphegor hummed softly as he sat down next to Mammon. Lussuria was the only one who had made a comment on Belphegor's change of attitude. Breakfast was eaten in silence, as usual. No one ever had much to say. Everyone was tired and grumpy and nothing exciting had happened yet. Everyone was antsy and ready to get out of the fortress. Everyone wanted to find something exciting to do.   
  
    For Belphegor, that something would obviously be trying to get Mammon to open up to him. Unfortunately, everyone else's plans would interfere with that. It was after breakfast was finished and Lussuria began to clean up that he decided to mention they were starting to run low on certain things in the kitchen. "I was really hoping I wouldn't have to run errands anytime soon... I've already got so much to do! I guess it'll all have to wait..." he muttered miserably.   
  
    "Oi! Why don't you let me go instead then, Luss? I can handle a friggin' shopping trip and I ain't got anything better to do today!" Squalo suggested, standing up from his seat rather quickly.  
  
    "Oh, Squa, would you really do that for me? You're an absolute angel!" Lussuria cooed.  
  
    "I should probably go with him," Mammon interjected. "If he goes alone, who knows what kind of trouble he'll get into. Not to mention he'll probably spend every bit of money we have."  
  
    Squalo glared at her. "Hey, shut yer trap, Mam! I don't need you to babysit me, ya know!" he shouted.   
  
    Mammon rolled her eyes. "Please, I wouldn't be caught dead babysitting you, Squa. But you can't tell me you know more about saving money than I do," she told him.  
  
    Squalo crossed his arms and huffed loudly in annoyance. "Yeah, yeah, whatever, fine. I guess you can come with me," he grumbled.  
  
    Mammon stood up from her seat, and Belphegor followed her. He wanted to go with them. After all, if the three of them were out together for the day, it would be the perfect opportunity for Belphegor to spoil her. "Hey, lemme come, too," he said, his grin broadening. "Could be fun, and I've nothing better to do today..."  
  
    "Actually, you do."  
  
    Belphegor's smile faltered and turned into a frown momentarily as he turned his head to look at the other end of the table, where the man who had spoken to him was sitting. Xanxus. The Varia's boss.  _Shit..._  Belphegor thought to himself. If Xanxus had plans for him today, there was no way he could get out of them. It looked like he was going to have to wait a while before he'd be able to spend any time with Mammon.   
  
    "Oh...? What do you have planned for me today, Boss?" Belphegor asked, forcing his smile to return to his lips.   
  
    "I've got a job for you. Meet me in my office after everyone else leaves. I'll give you your instructions then," Xanxus muttered. Without another word, he stood up from his seat and left the room.   
  
    Belphegor let out a soft sigh. He frowned again before forcing the smile back onto his face. He turned to look at Squalo and Mammon. "Don't get into any trouble, you two. That's my job," he said, and giggled softly.  
  
    "Yeah, don't worry. I'll make sure Squa doesn't do anything stupid," Mammon muttered, causing the white-haired man to growl.  
  
    "Just shut the hell up, eh!? I'll probably be the one that has to get your ass out of trouble by the end of the day!" he shouted.   
  
    Mammon rolled her eyes. "Whatever you say, Squa."  
  
    Belphegor could only chuckle more at the display that had just been put on by his friends. "Well, I guess I better go see what the Boss wants from me. You two should hurry up and get started with your shopping. Don't be out too late. I'll probably be back before you, and I don't want to be bored," he said in a sing-song voice. He flashed both Mammon and Squalo a genuine smile before leaving the dining room and going to find Xanxus.   
  
    Mammon looked at Squalo. "Bel's right, Squa. Let's just get this over with as fast as we can," she told him.  
  
    "I'm with you on that. The less time I have to spend with your lousy company, the better," Squalo grumbled.   
  
    Lussuria rushed over to them quickly, having finished up most of the cleaning in the kitchen. He was carrying a small slip of paper, and he carefully tucked it inside the pocket of Mammon's jacket. "There, that's the shopping list. If you think of anything else we need, you should probably pick it up, but make sure you get everything on that list first," he told her.  
  
    "Yeah, yeah, Luss, I know. Don't worry. I'm not stupid," she said dismissively, then added under her breath, "Unlike Sharkboy."  
  
    "Hey, I'm not stupid either, Moneybags!" Squalo shouted angrily. He then looked at Lussuria. "Don't worry, I won't let you down, Luss! I'll get everything on that list ASAP!" he declared.  
  
    "Well don't just stand here fighting, then," Luss scolded. "Get to work!"   
  
    At those words, Squalo took off running out of the dining room and into the hall. Mammon sighed softly and began to follow him. With how eager Squalo was to get his job done, and how determined Mammon was to keep him out of trouble, it wasn't that long of a run to the shopping center.  
  
    "Would you slow down, Shark-bait!? You're running like the Devil is chasing you!" Mammon shouted to him as she finally began to catch up to him. It was harder for him to run in a shopping center since he didn't want to knock any of the citizens over.   
  
    "You're just mad because you can't keep up with me, shorty!" Squalo teased.  
  
    "No, I'm exasperated because you're such a dimwit that you're trying to go shopping without even knowing what's on the list! I'm the one who has it, remember?" Mammon retorted.  
  
    This made Squalo stop in his tracks. She was right. He didn't have any idea what he was even looking for. He turned around and trudged over to Mammon, who was waiting for him with a light smirk on her face.   
  
    "Give me the damn list!" Squalo demanded.  
  
    Mammon shook her head. "Like hell I would. You can't do anything without getting into trouble. I'm gonna hold the list and I'm gonna do the shopping. You're just here to help me carry stuff, get it?" she told him.  
  
    "No way! Luss asked  _me_  to do the shopping.  _You're_  the one who's carrying stuff!" Squalo protested.  
  
    "Technically, Luss didn't ask you. You volunteered. And I volunteered to keep you out of trouble, which is exactly what I'm doing right now," Mammon said.  
  
    Squalo sighed heavily. "Look, why don't we just both take half of the list and meet up at the register later, okay? You have all the money. It's not like I can buy anything. I just wanna go get the stuff!!" he shouted.   
  
    Mammon was quiet for a moment before finally taking the list out of her pocket and tearing it in half. "Fine," she agreed, and gave one half of the list to Squalo.  
  
    Squalo took his half of the list eagerly "Bet I can get all my stuff before you!" he challenged. Mammon couldn't answer him before he had run off into the store to start on his shopping.  
  
    It didn't take Mammon long to finish her half of the shopping list. She knew where everything was and how to get to it quickly. She was done shopping and waiting near the register in twenty minutes. Squalo, on the other hand, was easily distracted and took twice as long to finish his half of the list. Mammon had to wait for twenty more minutes before he finally showed up at the register.   
  
    "It took you long enough," Mammon grumbled as she joined up with Squalo and they walked to the register together. "I've been waiting here for twenty minutes."  
  
    Squalo opened his mouth to retort, but found that he could think of no excuses for finishing so late. Everything he came up with sounded childish and would only embarrass him further. Instead of saying anything, he pursed his lips tightly and growled at Mammon, to which she responded with a soft smirk.   
  
    The two worked together to put the groceries onto the conveyor belt and watched as the man behind the register scanned the barcodes and put them into plastic bags. Neither Squalo nor Mammon said anything to the man behind the register. Mammon paid for the groceries while Squalo picked up the bags, and when he had all of them, he and Mammon left the store.  
  
    "Hey, why don't you let me carry some of those? How can you even see when they're all up in your face? You're gonna get yourself killed," Mammon said as she and Squalo began to walk away from the store.  
  
    "Shut up, Mam. I'm not a baby, I can handle a few shopping bags!" Squalo protested.   
  
    Mammon sighed, knowing she wasn't going to be able to change his mind. "Whatever. But if you trip and fall and break something I'm going to laugh in your face," she said.   
  
    Mammon had been too busy focusing on Squalo, who was too busy focusing on the bags he was carrying, to notice a young man in a green hoodie running towards them as fast as his legs could take him. He pushed himself between them, knocking Mammon over and causing Squalo to start losing his balance. He somehow managed to stay upright, but began shouting profanities back at the young man who had just ran past them.  
  
    Mammon groaned softly and pushed herself up from the ground. Immediately she noticed that something was wrong. She reached her hand into her pocket and felt around for the wallet she had been carrying with her, but it was gone. Her eyes widened and she stood up quickly. "That bastard took our money!" she shouted.  
  
    "Eh!?" Squalo exclaimed and snarled viciously. Mammon didn't have to say anything else before Squalo dropped all of the bags he had been carrying and began to run after the man who had stolen the wallet.  
  
    Mammon was surprised, at first, but then frustrated. She groaned in annoyance as she began to pick up all of the bags and then run after Squalo. Squalo and the man who had stolen the wallet already had a considerable head start on Mammon. Not only that, but her legs were a lot shorter than Squalo's were. It took her a little while to catch up with them, but eventually, she found them fighting with each other on a large bridge that stood over a rather busy road.   
  
    "Oi! Gimme the wallet back, bastard, or I'll tear you to shreds right here and now!" Squalo shouted as he tried to get his hands into the pockets of the other man's jacket to retrieve the wallet from him.   
  
    Every grab attempt that Squalo made was blocked by the man. He looked scrawny but he was a strong fighter. He was no match for a Varia Assassin, though. While at first Squalo had been taking it easy on the runt for the sake of keeping his identity hidden, enough was enough. He grabbed the man by the collar of his jacket and threw him into the ground. He then leaned over the man, stuck his hand into the front pocket of the man's jacket, and removed the wallet from it.  
  
    Unfortunately, the man had quick reflexes and a strong grip. He grabbed the other end of the wallet as Squalo tried to rip it away from him and held on tight. As Squalo was trying to pull it away from the other man, he accidentally aided his adversary in getting back on his feet. The two continued to grapple for the wallet; both of them pulling in opposite directions, trying to get it away from the other. Eventually, though, the other man gave up. He knew he was beaten. He let go of the wallet and quickly dashed away from the scene.  
  
    The recoil of the man letting go of the wallet sent Squalo stumbling backwards. He hadn't been prepared for the man to give up so easily. Squalo had been close enough to the rail of the bridge to tumble over the edge. He let out a surprised yelp and grabbed on to one of the bars that made up the rail just as it was about to pass out of reach.   
  
    "Fuck- Mammon! Help me, Goddammit! I'm gonna fucking fall!" he shouted. He wasn't angry, but scared. Mammon could hear it in his voice, and frankly, she was terrified as well.   
  
    She dropped the bags she was carrying just as quickly as Squalo had earlier. Her eyes widened even more as she saw Squalo hanging over the edge of the bridge. He was dangling above the traffic of the road below him. If his fingers slipped, he'd plummet into the road and would be trampled by the oncoming cars below.   
  
    She ran to him as fast as her legs could carry her and reached over the edge of the rail to try to reach him and pull him back over. "Give me your hand, jackass! I can't pull you up with my mind!" she shouted. She sounded angry, but on the inside she was panicked. Compared to the missions and battles that were part of their usual lives, this kind of situation was so simple. It was child's play. But somehow, that made it more terrifying.  
  
   Squalo quickly reached his free arm up to Mammon, who grabbed it quickly in one of her hands and reached for his other arm. He let go of the bar and latched onto Mammon's arm quickly. She pushed the soles of her feet against the bars on the rail and pulled Squalo up over the edge. He landed on his knees on the concrete of the bridge with a grunt. Mammon immediately knelt beside him and hugged him tightly.  
  
    "You're such a fucking idiot, Squalo! How could you be so stupid!? You could've gotten yourself killed!" she screamed out him.  
  
    Squalo was surprised by how much affection she was showing to him. She'd never hugged him before. She was trying to sound angry, but Squalo could hear her voice shaking. She was terrified and relieved all at the same time. Frankly, he was, too. All he could do in his shock was hug her back.  
  
    "I-I'm sorry, Mam... I was just trying to get the wallet back..." he said quietly.   
  
    Mammon let go of Squalo and pulled away from him. She tried to glare at him, but when she looked at him, she didn't have the heart to. Something had changed inside of her. It was strange and it was sudden, and she didn't know how to feel. She'd watched Squalo battle in duels to the death so many times before. Being in danger was what they were built for, but seeing that Squalo had almost lost his life to something that was so simple made her realize how vulnerable he really was, and how much she didn't want to lose him.   
  
    Mammon turned her face away from him and stood up. "C'mon. Let's just get home," she mumbled.   
  
    She walked over to the bags and began to pick them up again. Squalo stood up quickly and rushed over to help her. Once all the bags were picked up, they began walking back to their fortress in silence.  
  
    Squalo and Mammon said nothing to the others about their adventure that day. It was a silent agreement that it was something better left unsaid. It would spare both of them unnecessary questions and embarrassment from the others. Still, neither of them would forget what had happened anytime soon.  
  
    It was around the same time that Mammon and Squalo got back from their errands when Belphegor had returned from whatever mission Xanxus had sent him on. The air around him was happier than usual and he looked a bit dirty. The rest of the Varia could tell by just these simple facts that Belphegor had been sent to kill someone, and had succeeded.   
  
    Mammon didn't care much, though. Neither did anyone else. It was just a normal part of their lives. But Mammon did have something to talk about Belphegor to, and she wanted to do it immediately. As soon as she saw him again, she left Squalo and Lussuria to put the groceries away and went to talk to Belphegor instead.  
  
    "Bel," she said to him, calmly. "Come with me. I need to talk to you about something."   
      
    Bel raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Is that right?" he asked curiously. "Well, go ahead, then."  
  
    Mammon began to walk down the hall, and Belphegor followed her. They both entered an unused room close to where the main entrance to the fortress was. When they were both inside, Mammon shut the door to the room and turned to face Belphegor. He smiled at her.  
  
    "What's with all the secrecy, Mam?" he inquired in a sing-song voice. "What is it you need to talk to me about?"   
  
    "Remember what you said to me the other day? When you asked me when I was in love with someone?" Mammon asked quietly. Her voice was barely audible.  
  
    Belphegor's heart skipped a beat, and he knew his smile had wavered. Of course he remembered. That was a stupid question. The better question was why did Mammon bring it up again? What could she possibly want to talk to him about, pertaining to the subject of love?   
  
    He nodded slowly and subtly. "Yes... Of course I do. Why?" he asked.  
  
    Mammon inhaled deeply, and paused for a moment before giving Belphegor her answer. "Because I think I changed my mind... I am in love. And I don't know what to do."  
  
    A rush of emotions flooded through Belphegor like a tidal wave. He was filled with a sense of euphoria, triumph, and hope, but also great dread. Terrible, terrible dread. After all, there were only two outcomes here. Either Mammon was in love with Belphegor and was about to confess to him, or she was in love with someone else and was about to tear his heart out. He was scared to find out which it was, but so desperate at the same time. The need for an answer outweighed the dread of receiving one. He wouldn't hold back.  
  
    The smile slowly crept back onto his face, and he began to hum softly. "My, my, our little Mam's finally in love, is she...? How adorable..." he purred.  
  
    "Can it with the sap, Bel. Just tell me what I'm supposed to do. I don't like this feeling. It's hurting me," Mammon muttered.   
  
    "Well, if I were in your situation, I'd just tell them..." Belphegor began. "The worst that could happen is that they reject you, but anyone with brains in their skull wouldn't turn down a Princess like you..."  
  
    "How would you know? You don't even know who it is or why I fell in love in the first place. How would you know what the worst that could happen is?" Mammon spat.   
  
    "Because, darling, I'm an expert at these kinds of things," Belphegor replied. It was a bit of a stretch, he would admit, but it didn't matter right now. He just wanted to know who she was thinking of.  
  
    "So what? I just go up to them and tell them I love them? What kind of stupid ass plan is that?" Mammon growled.  
  
    "It's not stupid at all, Mammon. It's what you're supposed to do. They'll never know if you don't tell them, and if you keep it bottled up then it'll tear you apart. It's better to just let them know then spend an eternity keeping it from them and wondering what would happen if you told them. If they feel the same way, then you're lucky. If not, keep looking. It's not that hard," Belphegor told her.  
  
   Mammon sighed softly. "Yeah... Okay. I guess you're right. Thanks, Bel," she said. After that, she opened the door of the room again, and Belphegor's heart sank.  
  
    "Where are you going...?" he asked her.  
  
    "To tell Squalo that I love him."   
  
    The weight of Mammon's words hit Belphegor and tore through him like he'd just been shot in the heart. No, like he'd been stabbed in the heart with one of his own knives and his attacker wouldn't stop twisting it. He let her leave the room without a word, but once she was gone the tears started streaming down his face as if his eyes were rain clouds and a big storm was starting.   
  
    He was angry...  _Sad..._  Not only at her and Squalo, but at himself, too. In fact, it was mostly himself that he was upset with. He couldn't believe that he had thought even for a second that Mammon would ever fall in love with him.  _Him,_  Belphegor, Prince the Ripper, the psychopath of the Squad. The boy who stabbed his brother to death when he was only eight years old. The boy who killed people for fun and did it with a smile on his face. The boy who loved the taste of blood. Anyone who knew what was good for them would stay away from him, and that included Mammon.   
  
    But it hurt. It hurt so badly. It hurt that he loved her. It hurt that she didn't love him back, even when he had been so sure that there was a chance that she did. It hurt that she was in love with his best friend. It hurt that he'd be in love with her for months, even years to come, but she would probably never feel the same way. It hurt that he had been stupid enough to fall in love with her in the first place. But most of all it hurt that he had never told her how he felt, and that he knew he would never tell her, and no one would ever know.   
  
    As soon as he stopped crying, he'd walk out of that room like nothing had happened at all. He would lock away his feelings and hide them behind that crooked smile of his. None of them would ever suspect a thing. No one would ever see the turmoil he would be faced with whenever he looked at Mammon, or Squalo, or saw the two of them together. It didn't even matter to him that Squalo might turn her down. All that mattered to him was that he loved her, but he wasn't getting her.   
  
\---  
  
    "Squalo!"  
  
    The white-haired man turned to look at the purple-haired girl who was running up to him. He had been long done with helping Lussuria unpack everything and had been practicing with his sword in the courtyard. However, he put it down when his teammate came running to him.  
  
    "Well, look who finally decided to show back up. What was with you ditching me and Luss back there, anyways? What was so important that you had to say to Bel right away?" he asked her.  
  
    "I had to ask him for advice, because there's something important I need to tell you right now," Mammon said.   
  
    Squalo raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Well then go ahead and spill it already, shortstack," he told her.  
  
    Mammon looked up at him with the most vulnerable expression he'd ever seen her wear. He creased his brow as she took a deep breath and began to speak. "Squalo, when we were out shopping today and you almost fell over the bridge, I was terrified, for a lot of reasons. For one thing, I was terrified that I had become terrified. I've seen you in situations so much more dangerous than that and I never doubted that you would win and get back to us alive. But when I saw you hanging onto that bar and hanging above the road below the bridge, it occurred to me for the first time that we're still people. We like to think we're invincible and that nothing can hurt us, but we're not. We're all going to die someday. But I don't want you to die because of some stupid mistake!"   
  
    Squalo was surprised by her outburst, to say the least. He was so sure that they had opted to pretend as if the whole scenario had never happened in the first place. "Mam, you really don't have to worry about me... I'm not gonna get killed because of a fuck up, okay? I could've survived that fall, anyways. It's fine," he said, waving his hand dismissively.   
  
    "No, it's not fine! You don't understand!" Mammon shouted. "I was scared of losing you, Squalo! I don't want to lose you! And it's not just because you're my teammate or even my friend! It's because I love you, okay!? And I know it's taken me a long time to realize that, but it's true! That's why I was so scared! A-and that's why I spend the most time with you, and why I tease you, and why I get so angry when you do such stupid things! Because I want you around, okay!?"  
  
    Squalo's face went pale. Of all the things he had expected to hear from Mammon, that speech was not one of them. He wasn't quite sure how to react. "What did you say...?" he whispered.  
  
    "I said I love you, dammit! Open your fucking ears for once!" Mammon yelled.   
  
    All was silent for a moment. Mammon took deep and heavy breaths as she tried to calm down and recover from her outburst. Squalo stood silent as he tried to process what she had said. After a few minutes, he decided to speak again.  
  
    "So what...? You want to like, date me 'n shit?" he asked, still in shock.  
  
    Mammon sighed softly. "It's more than that, dickweed. But that's the start of it, I guess..." she murmured.   
  
    Squalo was silent for a few more moments before finally replying with "Well... Sure. Why not? Let's give it a try."  
  
    Mammon gasped softly as her eyes began to widen. "I... Are you sure? Do you mean that?" she asked him.  
  
    "Yeah. I don't see why we shouldn't. I mean... Truth be told, I've kinda always thought you were pretty cute too. It can't be that bad. Let's give it a shot."  
  
    Mammon had never smiled more in her life.  
  
    Meanwhile, Belphegor had witnessed all of this from his bedroom window. He had a perfect view of the courtyard, and while he couldn't hear all of what they were saying, he knew that Squalo hadn't rejected her. That was it. They were going to be together. There was nothing Belphegor could do about it.  
  
    He knew he'd never stop trying. He knew that, as long as she was around, he'd try to prove himself to her in subtle ways. He'd never try to take her from Squalo. No, he couldn't. They were his best friends. But he loved her, and he knew that he wouldn't be able to go down or let go without putting up a fight.   
  
    Tears began to stream down his face once again as he watched his friends return into the fortress together. He lingered by the window for a moment longer, replaying the scene he had just witnessed in his head a few times before closing the window and turning away from it. A whisper fell from his mouth, barely audible, though no one would ever hear it.  
  
    _"Goodbye, my baby..."_

**Author's Note:**

> and the award for most unoriginal summary ever goes to me lmfao  
> i just didn't really know what else to put i didn't want to give away the whole plot like it's harder to write summaries of oneshots
> 
> ANYWAYS
> 
> This is a birthday present for my best friend Lin <3 It's based off of a doujinshi that she showed me a few months ago (which i can't seem to find the link to at this very moment...)  
> Admittedly, when I was writing it, I kind of hated how it was turning out. I felt that it was a bit too cliche and I was nervous about the characterization because this is the first KHR fic that I've ever written. But reading back on it, I'm actually pretty happy with how it turned out! And I hope you guys are too. Thanks for reading!


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